Wednesday, April 24, 2019

But what if we had a society that didn't . . . .

I wonder.

What would happen if we didn't assume the worst of one another?  If people who are supposed to serve and protect assumed that the people they were protecting and serving were innocent?  Perhaps more of them would live. 

I can't help thinking that if we were able to help our students in school learn that authority can be dangerous, and that they ought to respect it, maybe we could prevent some of this tragedy.  But should it be the job of educators to teach that police might not ask twice? 

I don't know how to fix this society.  But I do know that my own life has been better since I started assuming best intentions.  Of most of the people in my life.  Of course, there are some that aren't deserving.  I suppose I have utilized game theory.  I assume altruism, until trust is broken.  Then I remove that assumption and assume they are untrustworthy until their actions prove otherwise.  For more reading on game theory and evolution:

https://www.nature.com/scitable/knowledge/library/game-theory-evolutionary-stable-strategies-and-the-25953132

Anyhow.  I know that for police, the game is life or death.  It is not the same for teachers - though we aren't free from risk, we aren't putting our lives on the line as police are.  So we build rapport, we understand why the folks who are oppositional and defiant are how they are, keep other students safe, and try to change the behaviors, while assuming best intentions.  But maybe the police could learn from us.  Maybe then, my former student would still be alive.


Students who don't immediately do what is asked of them

A few days ago, a former student of mine was shot and killed.  He was a student who was quiet, nice, and always eventually did what was asked of him.  Though he spent a lot of time in the hallways, usually out of uniform and with his hat on, he wasn't mean, malicious, or negative.  He would just smile at me and say, "yeah mister, I'm going to go to class," predicting what I'd say to him before I even said anything. 

It is tragic to me that this amiable student - who clearly knew what was expected - was shot and killed by police.  He never meant anyone any harm.  I never remember him being mean to anyone.  In fact, though he was almost never in class, he was also never confrontational with any adult about it.  He just went about his business, quietly, pleasantly, and without harming anyone or keeping anyone else from learning. 

Compare and contrast this with the 20 or 30 students who roam the halls now at my school, yelling at any adult who dares question them about their whereabouts.  They are actively disrupting our school environment.  One of them came in and yelled at me yesterday for having the audacity to write him up for roughhousing with 9th graders (he's a senior).  They are actively combative, and they do none of it with a smile.  I miss Anthony.

Anthony wasn't an academic star.  But he was a nice guy, who understood that it was our job to try to get him to class.  Though he didn't choose to participate academically as much as he could have, he was a good kid who benefited from being a part of our caring community.  I'm so sad that his life ended this way - because his aloof nature was interpreted a different way by an authority figure.  I wish I could see him tomorrow, ask him to get to class, and have him smile and say he would.